The two most basic elements of good communication are listening to others and asking questions. The physical process of hearing, where sound enters your eardrum and is registered in your brain, is not the same as listening. Listening is more of an attitude, a desire to understand what is being communicated. It is an essential communication skill.

Many of us don't listen very well, and we fake it a lot of the time. We pretend we are listening when we really aren't, and that can create a whole lot of trouble with other people.

The good news is that we can all learn to be better listeners. We can talk about listening in terms of two types of listening:

• Passive Listening: We hear the sounds but we aren't taking an attitude that allows us to hear the message.
• Active Listening: We make a conscious effort to hear and understand the message.