Anger is a two-step process:

Pain + Trigger Thoughts = Anger

First there is the pain. It might be emotional, like a feeling of loneliness, loss, or rejection. Or it might be physical, like a headache or a pain in your stomach. This is the fuel of anger. It’s like a can of gasoline sitting there.

The second part of anger is the trigger, the match that sets the can of gasoline on fire.

Then there is the anger itself, which has three parts. (Remember the dimensions of anger that we referred to earlier.) Our physical reactions might include:

• Our heart beats faster
• Our pupils dilate
• We breathe faster
• Our face may redden
• Our legs might turn to jelly