An effective way to explore what your own triggers and hot buttons are, as well as your reactions, is to keep an anger log. Keeping an anger log will help you to become more aware of the number of times that you become angry, as well as what your reactions are. If you consciously commit to raising your emotional intelligence about anger, you will find that your reactions become more constructive. You can then focus on moving ahead rather than being stuck in a pattern of repeating unhealthy behaviors.

There are different terms for an anger log; some try to put a positive spin on it and call it something different. However, we are looking at managing anger as a positive development in your life, so calling it an anger log keeps it real and helps you to focus.

Each anger event gets a separate entry in your log. When you get really comfortable using the anger log, you can memorize it and use it to work through tough situations. For example, if something happens on your way to the bus and you would normally record it, you will find yourself going through the steps in the log quite naturally.

In order to remember the steps easily, you can use the acronym SEFAC, which stands for:

• Story
• Examine beliefs
• Feelings
• Actions
• Challenge