Here are some questions to ask yourself when you find yourself caught up in a conflict:

• What is the conflict?
• Who are the players?
• If this conflict is resolved, what are the benefits?
• If this conflict is not resolved, what are the payoffs or benefits for me?
• If the conflict is not resolved, what harm can follow?
• If this conflict is resolved, will the benefit create a better situation than before the conflict arose?
• Whatever the outcome, can I see that the conflict added a positive dimension to the potential outcome?