Phase Three: Identify and Rate Underlying Needs (Use Color 3)
Person 2 should ask Person 1 what his/her needs are. Each need should be written on a sticky note and placed underneath the stated problem.
Person 1 should rate his/her needs, using a 1-10 scale, with 10 being a very high level need and 1 being a minimal need.
Switch roles and repeat these steps.
Identify needs that both parties have in common. Write these between the two columns.
Test if there is a possible win/win solution.
Do a process and content check. Is the conflict defined properly, or is something else really in conflict and the statement is just symptomatic of it? Revise the statement of conflict if necessary. Does each person feel listened to? Validated?